Finding Narnia
by ScarredNotBroken
Summary: No one ever said it would be easy. They may be back in England now, but they still had battles to fight, battles of a different sort. Still, they were determined to be the Magnificent, the Gentle, the Just, and the Valiant. /OR, Peter leaves for Uni, Edmund leaves for America, Susan fends off boys trying and failing to be men, and Lucy is losing her mind.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:**...I had to wait 2 days to post this because of an upload glitch, but I hope it was worth it because I'm honestly not sure how well this story will go over unless you can see the big picture and where all of these little plots are going, and I honestly don't think it's obvious this chapter, but I wanted it to be like that... That being said, I hope you don't let the initial way I present these characters scare you off from following/continuing. This story IS going somewhere, and it's going somewhere BIG - I just can't tell you where yet or that would spoil the story.

 _Initial notes:_ This is a different type of story, as I think you will see if you give it a chance to go somewhere. This story starts in 1946, just barely post-WWII. The world was a whole lot different than it is today in many ways, but in many ways it was much the same. I tried to do my research on this to make things as accurate as possible, but when it comes down to it, I am American not British, so certain aspects may not be correct. If you have a better understanding of England circa 1940 than I do, then please let me know if things are incorrect so that I can fix them in future chapters. There will be (non-denominational) _spiritual themes_ and possible _controversial issues_ as well, so be aware. (I hate making terribly long notes, and this one will be long enough as it is, so I will delve more into explanations on these as they come up, or feel free to review/pm me and I'll be sure to reply.)

As for the presentation of the Pevensie siblings, I am aware it is NOT the way most people paint them. But, can I be honest for a moment and say that I don't think they were quite the perfect angels most writers make them seem? That's honestly one thing I really appreciated about the movie adaption of PC, despite that it made it a less faithful adaption. This story is about making a journey, so, please, let them make a journey.

Disclaimer: Oh, the usual. I don't own anything. Though can I say that C.S. Lewis was an absolute peach to promote fanfiction and fanart before the Internet was even a thing? Because he totally did, and I am in love with that fact. lol

* * *

 **Chapter One**

* * *

Lucy scowled down at her feet, digging the toe of her shoe into the carpet, hoping the lecture would end with enough time to catch the earlier train home. She wanted to be there when Peter got in. Glancing at the clock, she saw that this hope was futile; the headmistress was only half done, and the train was leaving in less than fifteen minutes. Even if they left right now and sprinted the entire way, leaving their luggage behind, they wouldn't make it.

She sighed quietly. Of all the days to have sit through this…

Seven minutes, she estimated, glancing at the clock again. It was a bit sad, she had to admit, that she had sat through this same lecture so many times this term that she had it down to a science. Seven minutes… When she was so eager to see her brothers, she knew it would feel like an eternity. She would be angry about being delayed, but this situation _was_ her own fault, so she would quietly endure it.

The headmistress sighed, catching Lucy's attention. "I don't understand why this is such a difficult concept for you, Ms. Pevensie."

Well, that was a change. Still, she wouldn't dignify that statement with a response. She thought the answer was quite obvious, after all.

The older woman plowed on. "How many times have we had this talk this term? If I'm honest, I don't think you've listened a single time."

That was certainly _not_ true. She listened the first three times; after that, she had the timing down pat.

"What am I going to do with you, young lady?"

Once again, Lucy opted not to respond. The headmistress wouldn't understand anyway, so what was the point?

The headmistress leaned back in her chair, pinching the bridge of her nose. "You can go, Ms. Pevensie."

Lucy finally looked up from her feet, surprised. "Ma'am?"

"Go. Get out of here."

She hesitated. "You're… not going to finish lecturing me?"

The older woman gave a wry smile. "Would you listen if I did? Besides, it's the holidays. I'm sure you and your sister are eager to get home."

Lucy stood up, deciding not to point out that their train was leaving in ten minutes so it was much too late to catch it. "Then… Thank you. Have a wonderful summer, ma'am."

"You as well."

Lucy closed the office door behind her and let out a heavy sigh. What she really wanted to do was scream, but that was most certainly unacceptable behavior for a girl of fourteen, so she would have to settle for a sigh and her sister's ear to vent to. She turned the corner and was met with her sister's unapproving glare. "Mum's going to be furious you got called in again, you know."

"And here I thought you'd be on my side."

"I am, Lucy, but this isn't Narnia. This world works a whole lot differently, whether you like it or not."

"Like I said, I _thought_ you were on my side, but obviously not."

Susan sighed exasperatedly. "I promise you, I am. But everything in moderation, Lu; this world isn't quite ready for your revolution."

"It's so frustrating, though."

"I know." Susan offered a half-hearted smile. "But look on the brightside: you have the entire summer before you have to worry about getting that lecture again. And," she added, turning to leave the building, "the boys will be home when we get there."

Lucy offered her own half-hearted smile as she followed her sister. "I just wish we were on the train right now, but it _is_ my own fault. I'm sorry, Susan, and thank you for waiting for me."

"I wouldn't be a very good sister if I made you ride alone, you know."

Lucy smirked. "Is that so? Or is it more because you want me around so you don't get mobbed by boys from Hartbee's?"

Susan only rolled her eyes in reply. Lucy laughed.

* * *

"So, Mr. Pevensie, how has this term treated you?"

"Just fine, sir." Edmund stared at his headmaster across the desk, carefully masking his anxiety. The headmaster didn't simply call random students to his office just for a chat, and certainly not on the last day of the term. Everything about this situation was suspicious, and he didn't like it.

"Are you sure about that?"

He gulped. What was the man getting at? He racked his brain for any possible thing he could be in trouble for and came up blank. "Yes?"

The headmaster sighed. "Word does get around, Mr. Pevensie. I overhear conversations between your teachers all the time. They do like to talk."

Edmund's heart kicked up a notch. "I'm not sure I understand what you're getting at, sir."

The man shuffled papers around on his desk for a moment before speaking. "You've had perfect or near perfect marks for the last three years. I'd say you're doing quite well, wouldn't you?"

It was safe to say that by this point, Edmund was nothing short of confused. While he'd had his share of conversations with the man, none had proven so enigmatic. Though he'd heard from his peers that the headmaster had a tendency to talk in circles, he himself had never experienced that until now. "Sir, if I may be so blunt, I haven't any idea what you are trying to tell me."

The headmaster set down the piece of paper he had been holding, and folded his hands on top of the desk. "You do very well academically, Mr. Pevensie, but you are bored."

Edmund hadn't been expecting that and wasn't sure how the man had gotten from point A to point B, and, as a result, was momentarily speechless. "Sir?"

"Your teachers talk, young man; they talk _a lot._ 'He's a brilliant mind,' they say. 'The writing in his essays are way beyond his years.' I've spoken with them all in the last few months, and they all seem to agree. You are knowledgeable beyond your years, and you are wasting your talents here."

He had to admit that the curriculum wasn't entirely to his taste and was somewhat boring at times - it was nothing like what he had studied while in Narnia, after all - but what could he do? It would be the same anywhere else. "I'm afraid I still don't quite understand, sir. What, exactly, are you trying to get at?"

"Well, first of all, would you agree with what I have said? Are you bored? And, along with that, do you want something more out of your education?"

Edmund shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "I suppose, sir, if I am being perfectly honest, then, yes, I supposed I do find my studies a bit… dull."

"Good. Then I have a proposition for you, Mr. Pevensie, and I think you will rather like it."

* * *

Peter closed the door softly behind him, setting down his luggage just inside the entryway. The house was strangely quiet. He had thought his siblings would mug him the moment he had the door open, just like they had at Christmastime.

"I'm home!" he called. "Where is everyone?"

Helen Pevensie emerged from the kitchen, a bright smile on her face, and wrapped him in a hug.

"Hello, Mum. Where is everyone?"

She pulled away, her smile falling a little. "Susan called. Lucy got in trouble again, so they missed the first train. They should be home soon, though, dear."

He frowned. " _Again?_ What has gotten into her these days?" He shook his head. "What about Ed?"

"You know, I don't know. I haven't heard anything from him." She shrugged. "I'm sure he just missed the first train, as well, and he'll show up when the girls do."

"Well," Peter sighed, bending over to retrieve his bags again. "I guess I will enjoy the silence while it lasts then." He trudged up the steps to the room he shared with his brother. The space seemed much too large and empty without Edmund in it with him. Deciding he'd rather unpack later, he dropped his things on his bed and returned to the living room. Picking a book at random from the bookcase, he settled in to wait.

* * *

"Susan! Lucy! I thought you wouldn't taken the early train."

"We could say the same for you," Susan smiled, turning fully to face her brother. "Lucy got into trouble again, so we got held up."

Edmund frowned down at his little sister where she was still emphatically hugging him, her arms thrown around his neck. "What did you do this time, Lucy?"

She pulled away with a huff. "Nothing I don't always do, Ed. I just stated my opinion."

Edmund opened his mouth to reply, but Lucy cut him off.

"And don't even say it, Ed. 'Everything in moderation;' I get it. But she was so completely _wrong_ that I couldn't help myself."

He chuckled. "Well, I won't lecture. I'm sure between Mum and Pete, you'll hear enough anyway."

Susan frowned. "So why are _you_ leaving so late, Ed? Don't tell me you got into trouble too or something."

Edmund shifted uncomfortably, looking away. "No, nothing like that. I did get called in to the headmaster's office, though. I was there so long I thought I might miss _this_ train, too."

The girls exchanged a look. "Edmund," Lucy stated quietly, "if you weren't in trouble, then what did he want?"

He glanced back at them to find them staring at him with probing expressions. Looking away again, he sighed. "To present me with the opportunity of a lifetime, apparently." He shook his head to silence their inevitable questions. "I'll explain when we get home. I'd rather only have to repeat everything once."

"That's fair," Susan shrugged.

"Do you supposed Peter's home already?" Lucy asked, changing the subject.

"I have no doubt he is," Edmund replied. "I can't wait to get home."

* * *

Lucy was the first to step through the door, and as soon as she was across the threshold, she dropped her luggage with a screech and all but jumped into her brother's waiting arms.

"It's good to see you, too, Lucy," Peter laughed. In the next moment, he turned completely serious. "But I heard why you two are late."

"Oh, not now, Peter, please!" Lucy begged. "We just got home! Let me be happy to see you for _at least_ five minutes first."

After extracting himself from his youngest sibling's grip, he turned to greet Susan with a hug as well, and noticed his brother bringing up the rear. Hands on hips, one eyebrow raised, he addressed said brother. "I'll admit: as much as I want to hear why Lucy was in trouble, I'm just as curious to know why you're late as well, Ed."

"So are we," Susan interjected. "He wouldn't tell us."

Edmund rolled his eyes good-naturedly. "I'll tell when Dad gets home. I don't want to repeat myself is all."

Peter finally stepped up and wrapped his brother in a hug as well. "Is this a good thing?" he asked quietly.

Edmund readily returned the embrace. "Maybe. I haven't decided yet."

Peter pulled away, questioning with his gaze.

" _Later,_ Pete," he huffed.

Peter turned away with a smile. "So, Lucy. You've had your five minutes. What's this about getting in trouble?"

Lucy picked up her bags, making her way to the stairs. "Nothing you haven't heard already. Honestly. It _is_ always the same things."

"Yes, but what happened?" Peter asked, following her up. Edmund and Susan were close behind.

"Well," Lucy huffed, dumping her things on the floor by her bed, "politics came up in what we were discussing, and someone asked how much power a woman ought to be allowed to have. That closed-minded Patricia Jenkins had to stand up and say she believed women have enough as high as they are allowed now. I just don't understand how a woman can be so against women's rights, Peter. I mean, the Queen of England has plenty of power, and no one says anything against her."

"So you stood up and chewed her out," Susan added.

"Well, I wasn't about to sit idly by! I just… said I what I thought, that's all."

Peter sighed. "With much less tact than you ought to have, I'm guessing."

Lucy sat down on her bed. "I'll admit, perhaps I got carried away." She shook her head. "I'll never understand why some women don't think that women are capable leaders. Even the teacher sided more with that awful Patricia than with me." She paused. "I know I have some extreme ideas, but why is it so unbelievable?"

Peter sat down beside her and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Royalty is different I suppose - not that I agree or could tell you why, only that it is. You were a queen once, but this isn't Narnia, Lu, and you aren't a queen in this world."

"I know that!" Lucy interrupted angrily, standing back up. "And don't you dare say 'everything in moderation,' either! I get it! But why is it so wrong that I want to change the status quo?"

"Lucy," Susan interjected calmly. "You know I feel the same way, but there is a time and a place for everything, and your classroom at school isn't the place."

Lucy whirled around. "If school - _a place of learning -_ isn't the right place, then where is?"

"Someday it might be, but right now it's not. Before you can convince children of the truth, quite often you have to convince adults first, since that's where their ideas come from in the first place."

"Adults are so set in their ways that _nothing_ will ever change, Susan."

"You stick to your convictions, Lucy," Edmund spoke up quietly from the doorway. "You don't give up, and one day the adult is _you,_ and then you can make a bigger difference. Nothing great was ever achieved overnight. Something like this… You aren't alone, Lucy, but it will take time. But before you can make yourself heard, you have to prove you are worthy to be listened to."

Lucy could only stare at her brother, suitably chastised by one of the very first lessons they had learned as monarchs. Visibly deflated, she plopped back down next to Peter on her bed. "I know - or, at least, I _should have_ known. I'm sorry for getting angry. It's just not fair. Everyone else can openly state what they think, but my ideas are 'too radical' and 'unreasonable.' But you're right, Edmund. How could I forget something so important? I suppose I must learn to control my tongue until it can actually make a difference."

Peter sighed and wrapped his arm around his sister's shoulders again. "We all get a little over zealous sometimes. You might be in excess, however," he chided gently. "How many times has this happened this term now? Three?"

Lucy smiled a little. "Higher than that, big brother."

"In that case, I don't think I want to know," he chuckled. "Who knew that _you_ would turn out to be the troublemaker?"

"Well, I always did," Edmund smirked. "But I've been sworn to silence for the last ten years, so I'm afraid I can't elaborate."

Lucy rolled her eyes. "I _may_ have snuck out a couple of times at night… among other things… but really."

"Well, that's not really any secret. I was well aware of that myself," Susan stated. "You were well looked after."

Lucy sat up straighter. "You sent guards after me?"

"Maybe."

"Oh." They all turned to face Edmund. "I thought… Well, I didn't know that Su knew, so I did, too."

"What?" Lucy exclaimed. "What is this?"

Edmund shrugged. "You really think I'd let you go out unattended in the middle of the night?"

Peter gaped at his siblings. "How am I the only one who didn't know about this?"

"I would say 'because I'm sneaky,' but obviously I am not," Lucy pouted.

Edmund turned towards the hallway suddenly, catching their attentions. Below them, they heard a door close. Edmund turned back with a smile. "Dad's home."

* * *

"And that is how I simultaneously won and lost the game," Peter concluded. "No one really knew what to do after that!"

Dinner had come and gone, the dishes had been washed and put away, and the family sat around the kitchen table, nursing cups of tea and telling stories. They all had to admit Peter certainly had the most entertaining ones to tell.

As the laughter faded away again, Edmund was beginning to believe that he wouldn't have to explain anything tonight. But, leave it to his brother not to forget a thing.

"So, Ed," Peter started, "you promised you'd tell us what your headmaster wanted once Dad got home. Well, we're all here now, so why don't you explain?"

All attention was suddenly on Edmund, and the knot of anxiety that had been festering in his chest all afternoon and evening tightened painfully. He swallowed harshly; there was no way to avoid it any longer. "Uhm, yeah, I guess I did say that," he muttered, his gaze falling to his teacup.

James Pevensie frowned. "You got called in? About what?"

His hands tightened around his teacup. He wasn't really sure how to explain. Taking a deep breath, he decided to spit it out as plainly and quickly as he could. "I… he recommended me and I was accepted to study at a private school - in America." The silence that followed made him wish the floor would suddenly open up and swallow him whole. He hadn't been sure what to expect, and, since he couldn't bring himself to meet anyone's gazes, he still didn't know what they thought.

Then: "Ed, that's wonderful!"

He almost dropped his tea at the excitement in his brother's voice. Finally looking around, he realized the rest of his family felt the same; Peter had simply been the first to find his voice.

"It certainly is," James stated. "How did this come about though? You certainly didn't say anything to any of us about studying abroad."

Edmund released a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "That's because I didn't know anything about it until today. Apparently in the past year there has been a huge push to send students to study in other countries - you know, now that the war is over and everything. Though its mostly been university-based, there have been some secondary students, like myself, that have gone as well. Apparently the headmaster has connections to this American school so, because I've done so well these past years, he set the whole thing up. Once I get there, everything is paid for. The only thing we have to do is come up with the transportation." He paused before quickly adding, "If I go, anyway."

"Why would you not go?" James asked.

"You mean, I can?" he asked.

"It's a wonderful opportunity. I think you should." His father stood to refill his teacup. "Mind you, you don't have to. I certainly won't force you, but you should consider seriously if it would be something you would like to do."

"America is wonderful, Ed - at least, the part of it that I saw, anyway," Susan chimed in. "I think you would love it there."

Edmund nodded once, taking a sip of his tea. "Well… I don't know yet, but I would kind of like to. I need time to think about it, though."

As the conversation turned to other things again, he couldn't help but notice the anxious knot hadn't entirely gone away, and he had to wonder if it even would. Even with his family's full support, there was something there - something he couldn't identify - that held him back from making a decision. But, as Peter began another tale of his adventures at university, he decided he didn't need to figure out what that something was right that moment.

The summer holidays were just beginning; he had plenty of time.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Don't expect every chapter to come this quickly, but seriously, you guys left such sweet reviews that this just kinda...popped out. lol. I'm glad you all enjoyed the first chapter, and I hope you enjoy this one, too!

 _Chapter notes:_ I keep learning new things as I have to research more and more with each chapter, lol. Such as, did you know that British kids only get 6 weeks over the summer? I did not know this before writing this chapter. Be that as it may, I have no idea if it was the same in the 1940's, so you can see their summer break as however long you want it to be, lol. This is also still only about 2500 words of setting the stage. I promise we get into more _stuff_ next chapter, lol, but honestly this story _is_ intended to be more of a slow burn type plot.

 _Story timeline:_ So, a guest (All4Aslan) asked about this, so I will answer here, both for the benefit of all, but also because I can't reply, lol. I do basically take the 'established' timeline for the series, but I definitely agree with you that it has a lot of problems. C.S. Lewis was good at building his world book-by-book, but not for the series as a whole, lol. That being said, here is the info for their ages you were wanting: Lucy (as stated last chapter) is 14, and I place her birthday in April. Edmund is 15, but his birthday is the end of August. Susan is 18, and her birthday is in May. Peter is 19, and his birthday is in February. (There is a logic to this, but that's more of something for a tumblr post than an author's note, lol.)

 _Correction to last chapter:_ If anyone noticed, no one said anything, but I feel I must give credit where credit is due. Last chapter I mistakenly named an all-boy's school as Hartbee's. This is, in fact, not mine. You know how sometimes you can read so much fanfiction or a fanfic that just so impacts you that you start to see things as canon when they are not? Yeah, that happened. Hartbee's is the name of the school the boys go to in Tonzura123's fic, _P.E._ It's a brilliant work, but not mine, so therefore, the aforementioned school name does not belong to me. That being said, Edmund was still attending the _actual_ canon school of Hendon House, and is thus said in this chapter, but there could still be a Hartbee's that is an all-boys school, so I am going to leave last chapter as is. ;)

 _To my guest reviewers:_ I love you guys to bits, and I wish I could better reply and talk to you! Therefore, I have added some additional info to my profile, and if any of you have tumblr or the chat app Line, feel free to hit me up and talk there! (This goes for anyone, not just guests, but especially to them!)

* * *

 **Chapter Two**

* * *

The sound of crickets filled the afternoon air as Edmund pulled his line from the water. The summer skies had been overcast the past three days, and with the constant threat of rain, the two brothers had been forced to put off their fishing. Finally the skies had cleared, and they had been out of the door before most of Finchley had even begun to stir. Of all the things they did together, fishing was one of Edmund's favorites.

"How many did we get, Pete?"

Peter looked up from the bucket. "Enough for dinner with some to spare. We didn't do too badly."

They gathered their gear and headed for the road. The lake where they often fished was a bit of a distance from their home but not so far that it bothered either of them to make the trip several times in a summer. The long walk gave them that much more time to talk.

"I can't believe the holidays are half over already," Peter sighed. "It always goes much too quickly."

Edmund had been able to relax and put all his worries out of his mind while they fished, but now, with his brother's simple statement, everything came flooding back. He groaned. "Oh, please, don't talk about school, Peter."

Peter frowned. "Well, I didn't intend to take it any further than that, but now that I think about it… You still haven't made up your mind, have you? You're cutting it a bit close."

"I know." Edmund stared straight ahead. He knew well enough without his brother reminding him that he had only three days to make a decision. After that, it would be too late to make arrangements to travel to America, and he would be stuck going back to Hendon whether he wanted to or not.

"Maybe we should talk about it tonight, then," Peter offered slowly. "We've all wanted to give you time to decide on your own, but…"

Edmund sighed. "Maybe."

The pair lapsed into silence for several minutes as they continued down the road.

"I wonder if they play rugby."

Edmund abruptly turned his head to look at his brother, causing him to almost trip over his own feet in surprise as he was pulled from his own thoughts. "Sorry?"

Peter smiled. "I wonder if they play rugby at those American schools. You know, since you love it so much. Or maybe cricket at least? Do you suppose they play cricket at all?"

Edmund chuckled. "I honestly hadn't thought much about it. I hope they do, though."

"Well, you should find out, because that should be a deal-breaker," Peter joked. "Can't go if they don't play rugby or cricket!"

* * *

"I've told you a dozen times now: I'm not interested." Susan picked up the paper bag of groceries from the store counter and turned to leave, wishing not for the first time that she had somehow convinced Lucy to come along with her.

"You're going to end up an old maid with an attitude like that, you know, when you can't give a chap a chance."

She stopped in her tracks and, without turning to face the man again, she answered, "Better an old maid than married to someone who can't take a hint." She pushed open the shop door before he could think of a comeback and stepped out into the street. With any luck, he wouldn't bother to follow her and thus she could get home in good time still; the boys had returned with some beautiful fish, and she was quite eager to get cooking.

By the time she arrived home, the boys and their father had finished cleaning the fish, and the fillets were laid out on plates on the counter, waiting to be prepared.

Peter smiled as he finished drying his hands. "And you thought you'd be back before we were done."

"I got held up," she sighed. "I knew I should have taken Lucy with me."

Lucy shrugged. "Someone had to make bread since Mum's visiting her sister this week. Would you really trust one of them to do it?"

Susan shook her head. "No, but it still would have been nice to have had the company."

"Held up by someone trying to call on you, I'm guessing?" Edmund asked.

"Yes. That ignorant Robert Thatcher. I wish he'd learn to give up already." She turned to Lucy. "If you're done with the bread, cut these up, please?" she asked, holding out a bag of potatoes.

"Of course," Lucy replied, taking the bag.

"Wait," Peter spoke, sitting at the kitchen table. "Robert Thatcher. I know that name for some reason…"

Edmund's jaw clenched briefly. "Yeah, you punched his lights out for bullying me five years ago."

Peter frowned. "Ah, yes. I remember now. The one who thought it was a good idea to literally kick you around. What a _lovely_ fellow."

"He's not really any better now, either, if only more subtle in his force," Susan stated, finishing putting away everything she had purchased. "Though he apparently enlisted, so maybe the army will straighten him out."

"Well, if it doesn't," Peter continued with a smirk, "and he keeps bothering you, I'd more than gladly put him in his place again, considering he obviously hasn't learned his lesson about messing with my siblings."

"Peter," Susan began to admonish, but their father's laughter cut her off.

"Oh, you needn't worry, Peter," James stated, much to everyone's surprise. "If he actually dares to come calling, he'll get more than he bargained for from me alone."

Susan turned towards her father, slightly aghast. "Father, you aren't really setting a good example right now!"

He shrugged. "No matter how old you get, you'll still always be my little girl, and a father has to protect his daughters, does he not?"

Susan rolled her eyes, turning back to the fish, recognizing a moment too late that the joke was on her. Peter, she had no doubt, would actually still punch the man in the face. Her father, on the other hand, would not. Oh, no; he wasn't a college language and literature professor for nothing. He would tear the poor boy down with words that would be far more scarring than a broken nose ever would be.

"You know, all of you are going to have to get used to boys coming to call on me," she stated, coating the fish in breading. "Especially now that I've finished my schooling."

"We know," James stated benignly as her brothers tried not to laugh in the background, "but they will still have to be met with approval. Otherwise…" He trailed off, waving one hand vaguely.

Susan couldn't help but smile. She had to admit she was glad for a family that cared so much about her future happiness. _Speaking of the future,_ she thought. "Ed, have you decided what you're going to do yet?" she asked, changing the subject.

The sudden silence in the room was palpable. When she turned her head to look at her younger brother, the dark shadows on his face didn't escape her. Her hands stopped their work. "Edmund?" she asked gently. He continued to scowl at the floor, and from his obvious lack of enthusiasm, she could already guess the answer to her question.

Peter breathed out noisily through his nose. "No," he answered in place of his brother, "he hasn't."

"And don't even remind me of how little time I have," Edmund snapped, finding his voice. "I'm well aware."

Peter stood from his chair. "We were going to wait until tonight to talk about this, but maybe it had better be done now." He jerked his chin towards the door. With only a small huff in response, Edmund obeyed and left the kitchen with Peter right behind him.

The two girls exchanged a look with their father. It was unusual for Edmund to snap at any of them like that anymore.

"What was that all about?" Lucy asked.

No one had an answer.

* * *

Peter closed the door to their bedroom behind him as Edmund flopped down on his bed.

"Alright, Ed. Tell what this is _really_ about," Peter instructed gently but firmly as he sat down beside his brother.

Edmund opted to stare out the window rather than meet his brother's gaze. "I don't know why this is so difficult, alright?" he snapped. "I just don't."

"If you knew, we wouldn't be having this conversation. So talk to me, Ed. Whenever you think about it, what consumes your thoughts?"

Edmund sighed, still refusing to meet his brother's gaze. "Well, in the first place, it _is_ a wonderful opportunity. From what the headmaster told me, my studies would be far more challenging there. They have a bit of a different system for teaching, and there is a little more freedom in what you're allowed to study. I can take more classes that actually interest me, so I won't be so bored anymore. And, because I'd be going to another country, I'd get to experience another part of the world. I can't imagine the culture is terribly different, but all the same, it would be exciting to see where it _does_ differ."

"Okay," Peter spoke after a moment of silence. "That all sounds like reasons you _do_ want to go. So then tell me why you _don't_ want to go."

Edmund stared out the window in silence so long, Peter was almost afraid he wasn't going to answer. But then he took a deep breath and quietly continued. "It's just… Everything I know is here. You, our sisters, my friends… I know everything here; it's familiar and comfortable, and I guess I just keep wondering if it's worth it to leave everything I know behind to go to a place I know nothing about. I mean… the thought of going somewhere new is thrilling, but... " He trailed off, but after only a moment finished his thoughts. "It has taken me so long to make _actual_ friends at Hendon…"

Peter folded his arms, resting his elbows on his knees. When it was clear his brother had said all he was going to say, he responded. "You know, it would seem to me that the only thing holding you back is… fear."

Edmund scrunched up his brow. "Fear?"

"Fear," Peter repeated. "And, honestly, I can't blame you. You'd be going to a place you don't know and where you don't know anyone. You'll be alone there. Everything is an unknown. So it's a reasonable emotion to feel. But tell me, if you set aside the fear of the unknown, what would you choose to do?"

"I'd go. In a heartbeat."

"Then why are you letting fear hold you back?"

Edmund sighed. "I wish it was that simple."

Peter was silent for a moment. "Ed, do you remember the first campaign you went out on alone in Narnia? You were barely sixteen then. I was in the North, and Susan was so busy running things in my absence that she didn't have the time to go. Lucy would have - bless her - but she was too young still and knew she'd be in serious trouble if she went against my wishes. That left you, and only you. Lucy told me when I returned that you had been terrified to go alone, but you still went anyway."

"What's your point, Pete?"

Peter smiled fondly. "You came back in victory, and that experience changed you into a better king. You were so much more confident after that. You had to leave everything that was familiar and comfortable in order to become a better leader. Maybe this, too, is meant to make you a better person - to help you grow in a way you wouldn't otherwise be able to."

"That may be true, but it doesn't make it any less terrifying."

"No, but quite often terror comes right before doing something insanely brave."

Edmund finally turned his gaze from the window to meet his brother's. "You're trying to say I should go, aren't you?"

"If fear is the only thing keeping you here, then, yes, I do think you should go. Back then, you had to leave us behind to learn your own capabilities. Perhaps this is the same. Some things you can't know until you leave everything else behind." He paused and shrugged. "Besides, if you end up hating it, you don't have to go back the next year, you know."

Edmund sat up with a sigh, averting his eyes again. "We really should have talked sooner, shouldn't we have?"

"Probably," Peter replied lightly, "but at least it's sorted now. That's what matters."

Edmund swung his feet to the floor, stood, and headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" Peter asked.

"Well, if we're done here, I'm going to go apologize to Su for snapping at her. And then I'm going to tell everyone the good news."

* * *

 _1 August 1946_

 _To Headmaster Charles A. Davis_

 _Greetings!_

 _It is with great pleasure that I write to inform you that one Edmund J. Pevensie has accepted your offer to study at your fair school of St. John's beginning this coming term on the third day of September 1946, and has received all required documents to do so. Mr. Pevensie will be arriving by boat to the port in Boston, Massachusetts, on the thirty-first day of August. From Boston, he will come by train, expecting to arrive in the afternoon of the same day._

 _I cannot thank you enough on his behalf. As saddened as I am to lose such a brilliant young mind, I know he will excel under the fine tutelage of your professors._

 _I look forward to hearing from you again soon._

 _Albert E. Wilson, Headmaster of Hendon House, London, England_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** Ya'll are seriously awesome. Thank you all for the reviews, faves, and follows! I hope you all enjoy this chapter too! :D  
(I could have posted this over two hours earlier, but I keep getting distracted by Hawaii Five-O. Oops. Blame my hubby, lol.)

 _Chapter notes:_ Okay, let's face it... there is no set up. It's all story. It's altogether. Yes. Have some plot. *throws pages at you all*

 _All4Aslan:_ You are very welcome! I have the headcanon that conversations like that were a dime a dozen and went both ways, lol. I'll admit, James is based a bit on my dad, lol. He doesn't appear very much in this story, but he was definitely the daddiest dad, complete with whatever the 1940's version of dad jokes were, but also completely where they all get their sass and wit.

 _Chickencomes1st:_ Here you go, my lovely nonny! :) I'm glad you're enjoying it thus far! I have lots in store for all four of them!

* * *

 **Chapter Three**

* * *

Edmund was restless. No matter how hard he tried to fall asleep, knowing full well just how early he had to get up in the morning, he just couldn't. The fact that he couldn't seem to sleep only added to his mounting anxiety. Ironic, he thought, considering his worries were what was keeping him up in the first place and now not sleeping was also keeping him from sleeping. Giving in, he sat up with a quiet groan. He was going to be exhausted no matter what, so he might as well not continue to lie in bed, which was only succeeding in furthering his frustration.

Being careful not to disturb his brother - or the rest of the house, for that matter - he shuffled out into the hallway, leaving the door open a crack. He debated for a moment between his father's study or the living room but decided that, as long as he skipped the creaky step, the living room would be better.

As he reached the bottom of the stairs, he was surprised to see a crack of light under the kitchen door. He frowned. Who in their right mind would be up at this time of night? Abandoning his previous destination, he pushed open the door, squinting in the harsh light.

"Su?"

His sister turned from the stove where she was heating water in the kettle and smiled at him. "I'll grab another cup."

He smiled back, sitting down at the kitchen table. "So what are you doing up?"

She set the second cup beside the first on the counter and turned back to the stove as the kettle began to whistle. "Oh, just worrying. Like usual."

"Anything in particular?"

"Lots of things." She paused. "Mostly you, though."

"Well, I think I'm doing quite enough of that for the both of us, so I guess you can go back to bed," he joked.

She smiled. "If only it worked that way."

A few moments passed in silence as Susan prepared their tea and brought the cups to the table.

"Hopefully this will help both of us sleep," she commented as he took a sip.

"You, maybe," he replied, glancing at the clock, "but I would have to get up in a couple of hours as it is. It might be better if I just stay up at this point."

Susan winced. "I didn't realize the hour." She sighed. "Well, I supposed you can sleep once you're on board."

He yawned. "I hope so, but I wonder how much sleep I'll actually get between now and the start of the term. Aslan knows how much I've managed lately as it is."

"I remember when I went over with Mum and Dad a few years ago. It was terribly exciting, but the circumstances are quite different… If I'd been going alone, I'm sure it would have been much the same for me." She paused. "Back then, it was quite strange to be without you three for so long, but now I supposed it's much the same. We're all going to be in different places this term."

"It's going to be really strange," Edmund agreed. "I don't think it's ever quite been this way before."

"It certainly hasn't." Susan took a sip of her tea. "But that doesn't mean it's a bad thing. If things never changed, no progress could ever happen. It doesn't pay to be stuck in place your whole life."

"I know, but does it have to be so stressful?" Edmund commented. "I mean, really. This would be so much easier if I could just _sleep,_ but no." He rolled his eyes.

Susan chuckled. "Nothing of worth ever comes easily."

"Not asking for easy, just for _sleep."_ He rubbed at the corners of his eyes. "Hard to sleep when you can't even breathe, though," he added under his breath.

"Well, tea can certainly help with both of those problems," Susan stated. "Hopefully your dorm kitchen will be well-stocked."

"If it isn't when I get there, it soon will be. Hopefully they have good tea in America."

"I thought it was decent when I was there, but I'm not quite as picky as you are, either. But if it's not good enough for you, you'll just have to hold out until Christmastime and take some back to school with you."

Edmund smirked. "Oh, I'm already taking some with me. It won't last the whole term, though."

Susan rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "You and your tea…"

His smirk turned into a smile. "I don't know what I'd do without it."

The kitchen fell into a comfortable silence, the siblings content to sip their tea, the only sound the steady ticking of the clock.

"So," Edmund spoke after a moment, "give me more advice for America, Su."

Susan leaned back in her chair. "Well, I don't think I have any beyond what I've told you already. Study hard, don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it, be yourself, reach out to others." She shrugged. "It may be a different country, but the rules are still the same, you know?"

"'Do unto others,' in other words," he muttered over the rim on his cup.

"I think that sums it up nicely, yes." She paused. "I wish there was more I could say to help ease your mind."

He sighed. "So do I, but I know there isn't anything that would. I just hope it'll be easier to relax once I get there."

Susan smiled. "I think it will be. I don't think your nerves will be quite so on edge once you arrive and start meeting people. Just remember: you won't be the only new student. You may be travelling a bit farther than most, but you're all in the same boat regardless."

"I know…"

Susan leaned forward, catching his gaze. "Just promise me you won't lock yourself in your room when you get there. I know it'll be a bit awkward at first, but if you don't at least try, it's going to be a very long term for you."

Edmund gave a hesitant smile. "I know. I'm going to try. Really."

"Good." She sat back with a grin. "And I fully expect a letter in the first month, detailing everything you're been up to."

His smile widened into a look more genuine. "You know I will."

They finished their tea in companionable silence. When Susan picked up their empty cups and stood to put them in the sink, he said, "You should probably go to bed."

Susan shrugged, glancing out the window. The sky to the east was beginning to grow lighter. "No point now." She turned back to him with a smile. "Let's go out and watch the sunrise."

Edmund stood as well. "Why not?"

Susan unlatched the kitchen door and led the way around to the side of the house where their mum's flower garden was in full bloom still. She sat down on the bench facing east and her brother didn't hesitate to sit beside her.

The air was chilly, but neither really minded. As the silent moments passed by, the world began to come to life as the sun painted red and orange over the deep blue. Birds began to sing in the trees, and the owl turned its head under its wing.

Neither of them had any idea how long they sat, but when noise of breakfast being prepared drifted out to where they sat, Edmund finally murmured, "I suppose we ought to go in."

"I suppose so," Susan agreed, standing stiffly. "The sun has almost fully risen now, and you have a boat to catch."

He stood and followed his sister back around to the kitchen door. When they stepped inside, Lucy greeted them brightly.

"Good morning, Susan. Edmund. It looks to be another lovely day, doesn't it?"

Susan moved to help Lucy with breakfast, and as idle chat about weather and what they were making filled the room, the rest of the family slowly trickled in.

The rest of the morning was a blur for Edmund. He couldn't tell anyone after what he had eaten that morning, only that he had eaten as much as he dared since his nerves made his stomach uneasy. When he had finished, he made short work of preparing to depart, gathering a few last-minute items and stuffing them in one bag or another. He was closing and latching his suitcase when he heard the knock on the door below. His old headmaster had arrived to take him as far as the port and to make sure he got to the right place. He grabbed his bags and headed down to say his goodbyes.

For a moment there was nothing but arms and a cacophony of goodbyes and well-wishes as everyone got 'just one more hug' before he left.

As he hugged his little sister one last time, she squeezed him tightly and whispered in his ear, "Aslan be with you, until we meet again."

With barely a thought, he found himself whispering the customary response, "And with you, until our paths cross."

As he pulled away and gathered his bags, he felt a warmth blossom in his chest, chasing away a good bit of the anxiety resting there. He turned to follow his old headmaster with a genuine and peaceful smile on his lips.

 _After all, he wasn't going alone - not really._

* * *

Peter thought his room felt absurdly empty without the presence of his brother taking up the other half. This feeling was so potent he was to the point he was almost glad he was heading back to Cambridge in two days' time. He would, at least, have a roommate again.

He had just finished changing for bed when a quiet knock sounded on his door.

"Come in."

Just as he had suspected, Lucy entered, closing the door behind her again. Without saying a word, she sat down at the foot of his bed, pulling her knees up to her chest, and resting her chin on her knees.

He sat down beside her and waited for her to speak her mind.

"Peter," she spoke after a moment, "I don't want to go back to St. Finbarr's tomorrow."

He smiled fondly at her. "I know you don't, but I'm afraid you must."

"I'll just keep getting into trouble, you know."

"You must learn to bridle your tongue, dear sister."

"But they're all just so… ignorant!"

"Lucy, I do understand how you feel," Peter responded. "But if anyone can find a way to convince others to listen, it's you. You did it in Narnia; you can do it here, as well."

She sighed. "I guess I'm just afraid that in order to get people to listen I have to stop talking so much. If I stop standing up for what I think now, they might think I'm being hypocritical, and then then they still won't listen."

"You don't have to _stop_ standing up. You just have to find a _better way_ to stand up," he countered. "They won't listen to you right now, so how can you change the way you _act_ to reflect what you believe to be true?"

"The old 'actions speak louder than words' adage?" Lucy asked. "I supposed that could work, but I'm not really sure how to execute it."

"How did you do it in Narnia?"

"'We aren't in Narnia anymore,'" she mimicked.

"I know," Peter chuckled. "But I do think you can take the same general principles and apply it to now, don't you? You are still Lucy the Valiant, after all."

She smiled back. "Well, back then, it was a lot of show - putting on a lot of elegant flare without looking too pompous. Yet, at the same time, it was being humble enough to ask for advice when we needed it. Even the most skeptical Narnians came to respect us when they saw that we were confident but still valued the opinions of others."

"So, then, apply that to now," Peter directed.

"Well, I don't exactly have a problem being confident, but… I could ask others to explain their views?"

"And then proceed to _not_ tear them apart, limb for limb," he added.

A look of recognition dawned on her face. "I ask questions that cause them to question their views."

"I knew you'd get there," Peter stated proudly. "That way you look like you're interested when really you're just sowing seeds of doubt."

Lucy looked thoughtful for a moment before asking, "So, does this mean I also have permission to jump in puddles after it rains?"

"I'm not sure how that's relevant," Peter stated with a chuckle. "But, not, you don't."

"Oh, come on. That's how Ed and I won over that family of Ducks."

Peter laughed heartily. "I always wondered how you two managed that! I don't think that'll be necessary here, though."

"What if it is?" she pressed, an expression of mock-seriousness painted on her face.

Peter sighed in equal mock-exasperation. "If it comes down to that, then I suppose you have my permission."

Lucy stood up with a smile. "Why, thank you, your majesty." She bowed. "And now I must retire to my chambers. The morning dawns early."

"Rest well, my lady," Peter chuckled. "I shall see you on the morrow."

* * *

"Must you really leave tomorrow, Peter?"

Peter glanced towards the open door of his room with a smile. "It's a bit lonely having your own room after all this time, isn't it?"

Susan sat down on the bed abandoned by her younger brother only four days earlier. "And it's only going to feel even more lonely here when you leave in the morning."

"I think you'll get used to it," he sighed, sitting down beside her. "Besides, you'll be so busy with that new job of yours you won't have time to miss us."

She forced a half-hearted smile. "Perhaps, but I doubt the library is _that_ busy all the time."

"You might be surprised. Anyway, it's not like we're leaving forever. You'll still see Lu and me every holiday, and Ed will be home at Christmastime."

Susan sighed. "I do suppose some years in Narnia weren't any different, were they?"

"No, not very. But at least here you know that no one is going to come crashing through the gate with an axe on Christmas Eve."

She chuckled. "I don't know why we were even surprised. That whole year was a mess of things of the like."

"See? This term can't be as bad as all that."

Susan looked down at where her hands rested in her lap. "Perhaps. But we don't know what will happen regardless."

Peter bumped her shoulder with his. "Minotaur with an axe, Su."

"I know, I know. I worry too much." She raised her gaze to meet his again, the hint of smile turning up the corners of her mouth. "I know everything will work out. It's just hard to remember that sometimes."

"Believe me, I know." He smiled at her. "But I just have to keep reminding myself that, even here in England, we are still between the paws of Aslan."

She turned away again. "Peter," she started, her lips turning down into a frown again, "do you think I'll end up an old maid?"

Peter leaned back slightly, crossing his arms over his chest. "I can't really say. That's not in my power to decide. What would be so bad about _not_ marrying anyway? None of us did in Narnia."

"Yes, well, this might sound like a horrid reason, but Lucy is right about the lack of rights women have, and if I don't marry I'm likely to never leave this house. Besides, it's not as though it's a bad thing to marry, and I'd like to. I had suitors even in Narnia; it was just that none of them were right."

"I never said it was a bad thing, Su. I just don't think you should worry so much about it. You're going to be working on a university campus. You'll meet a lot of different people there, and many of them will be infinitely better than that horrid Robert Thatcher. So put him and all the awful things he's said out of your mind, and focus on just being _you."_

Susan was silent for a moment. "I suppose it makes me a bit of hypocrite, doesn't it? Since I basically gave Edmund that same advice."

"Well, it's not exactly easy advice for anyone to follow, is it?" Peter returned. "Myself included."

"I suppose." Susan smiled and turned back towards her brother, head tilted slightly to the side. "Everyone has been coming to you with their worries lately, haven't they? Have you none of your own, brother mine?"

Peter thought for a moment. "You know, Su, I really don't. I'm rather excited for the term to begin. My only worries are you, Ed, and Lu."

"Do you think they'll be alright?" Susan asked after a moment. "They're both entering new territory this year; Lucy, without me there, and Ed on a whole different continent."

"They will be," Peter answered confidently. "Aslan will guide them, just as He always has."

Susan sighed. "How can you know that, Peter? How do you know He's still watching out for us here?"

"Because He told us He would be. What other proof do I need?"

"He also said we could find Him in this world, but none of us have."

"Not yet," Peter responded. "But He's never shown Himself to us right at the start. _We_ always had to seek _Him_ first. We just have to keep looking."

"What if He never shows up, Peter? What then?"

With an unwavering gaze, Peter answered, "That just means we aren't looking in the right place."


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** So, the original plan was to update, oh, every other week. That obviously did not happen this time. This chapter did NOT want to be written. XP  
As always, thank you all bunches for the lovely reviews, faves, and follows! ^.^  
(I wanted a happier ending for this chapter, but don't think for a moment that anything is over yet. This thing is going to end up with, like, 20 chapters minimum, sooo...)

 _Chapter Notes:_ This is more or less written in a chronological timeline, but it's weird writing in two different time zones, lol. The first two scenes take place on Saturday, Aug. 31. The last one is Sunday Sept. 1. I won't usually write chapters like this. Edmund, because he's in a different time zone from the other three, will mostly have chapters to himself in the future, but it's actually important to have this chapter written like this for later, lol.

 _Religious Notes:_ First chapter I said that religious themes would be non-denominational, and I meant it. However, a character in this chapter is introduced as explicitly Catholic. It's important for the progression of the story, but I will not place any certain denomination on the Pevensies. (To put this choice in prospective, I am not Catholic myself. And the school Edmund's school is based on is Episcopalian. So there you go. lol)

 _School Notes:_ I feel I should note stuff about Edmund's school. It's not terribly important (hence why it's not in the text itself), so you can skip this unless you are actually interested. I based his dorm partly on my own experience in college, partly on the actual set up of the dorm of one of the schools his is based on. You can picture the dorm any way you'd like, but think of it as less of a dorm and more of a giant house. I picture it as a bi-level (you go in the front door and right away there are stairs going up/down), with the kitchen and living room in the middle of the building on the upper level, and a rec room on the lower level. Student rooms are on one side, faculty apartments are on the other. (And by 'apartments' I mean full-on, multiple-room apartments.)

 _Anon Reviews:_  
All4Aslan: Thank you, love. /hugs/ I, too, would love to Peter as a big brother, lol. Hope you enjoy this chapter, too! ^.^  
chickencomes1st: You aren't being paranoid, mwahahahahaha! *ahem* No Lucy this chapter, I'm afraid, but you'll see lots of her next chapter. :)

* * *

 **Chapter Four**

Edmund flopped spread eagle on his bed, relishing in the silence. This was the first moment of peace he'd truly had since watching the sunrise in England with his sister; this was the first moment in five days he'd had to himself. As soon as he'd arrived on the docks, his old headmaster had passed him off to a friend whose family was also boarding. He had spent the entire trip across the Atlantic with them. When he had arrived in Boston, he'd been passed off to yet another friend who proceeded to take the train all the way to Concord with him. Upon arriving at the station, he had been passed off to the headmaster of his new school who hustled him into a waiting car to take them to their destination yet another hour away.

While he had known arrangements had been made, he had also thought he'd be mostly left to his own devices. 'You're a minor,' had been the answer when he'd inquired, 'can't have a minor traveling alone like that. It wouldn't be fitting.' Oh. Yes, he supposed that _was_ true, wasn't it? All the same, he would have preferred it. At least then he wouldn't have felt smothered with unwanted but obligatory attention from strangers.

But, as he glanced around the room he would be calling his for the coming months, he almost wished for that exhausting small talk again. At least when he was forced to make conversation he wasn't thinking about home and how much he already missed it.

Edmund groaned quietly when a knock sounded on the door. He knew the peace and quiet wouldn't last forever, but he had certainly been hoping for slightly more than five minutes. Raising his head off the mattress to at least half-properly greet the intruder, he said, "Come in."

A head of curly blond hair poked around the door followed by the bespectacled face and tall, wiry frame of a man he had only noticed briefly upon first entering the dorm not ten minutes ago. He didn't know the man's name yet, but, from what he'd been told, Edmund could assume he was a teacher here and lived in one of the apartments adjacent to the dorm. He sat up the rest of the way.

"I don't want to disturb you," he started, his American accent a further reminder of just how far from home Edmund was, "but I thought I'd come introduce myself. My name is Marvin Wallace. I teach history and politics here at the school. I'm also the head of this dorm, as well as your advisor, so if you need anything, please don't hesitate to come find me. I'm in the first apartment." He gave a short sigh. "Now that that's out of the way, I'll let you get settled. I'll start dinner around five o'clock. If you'd like to help, you're more than welcome; if not, I'll come bang on your door again when it's ready. Alright?"

"Thank you," he responded quietly. "I might come help, but, between you and me, my sisters have tried to teach me to cook, but I'm not much good at it."

Mr. Wallace looked thoughtful for a moment before replying with a smile, "You know something? I'm not much good at it either, I'd reckon." He shrugged. "Oh, well."

Edmund couldn't help but smile back. "Well, I guess I can't make things any worse, then, can I?"

"No, not likely. Anyway," he said, turning back towards the door, "I'll leave you to your unpacking."

As the door clicked shut again, Edmund fell back on the bed with a sigh. Unpacking? He felt more like _napping,_ if he were honest. He lay staring blankly at the ceiling for a moment before rolling to his feet. As much as he wanted to sleep, unpacking needed to come first. Once everything was out and organized, maybe he would feel a little more at home and be able to relax better.

 _First things, first,_ he thought, undoing the clasp on his satchel and pulling out a photograph of him and his siblings. It had been taken recently - only a few months before - and had replaced the previous photo of the four of them that had occupied the worn wooden frame. As he folded out the desk stand, an envelope dropped down onto the desk. Setting the frame upright on the shelf above the desk, he abandoned the task of unpacking in favor of discovering the contents of the envelope.

It wasn't properly sealed - the flap was only folded in - and he wasted no time opening it and pulling out the folded paper. He instantly recognized the hand writing as Lucy's and sat back down on the bed to read.

 _My dearest brother,_

 _I hope this letter finds you well and settling in alright at your new school. It's strange to write that statement since, at this moment, you're dead asleep in the next room, but all the same, I hope everything is going well when you finally see this. I cannot sleep for being compelled to write to you, strange as it seems, but I feel it must be Aslan's doing, so here is what I believe I must tell you:_

 _Never forget who you are and, even more so, Whose you are._

 _You are the Just King. Do right by all, and you're path will remain straight and clear. Justice and mercy go hand in hand. Be fair. Do not be harsh. Walk in the manner worthy of a King of Narnia._

 _You are Aslan's. You were bought with a price. You are loved. Be confident. Do no doubt yourself. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Walk in the manner worthy of a child of the True King._

 _You are not alone, Edmund. You never are. Aslan said He would be with us in the world as well, and I still believe that He is - even though we haven't seen Him yet._

 _Stay strong, my brother. Do not lose faith. Do not be afraid of what lies ahead. He is with us. Always._

 _Your loving sister,_

 _Lucy_

 _P.S. Don't be afraid to talk to people and reach out to those around you. Everyone is brought into our lives for a reason, to change us or to teach us. Don't miss out on the opportunities before you._

Edmund smiled as he folded the paper back up and returned it to the envelope. Typical Lucy, knowing exactly what he needed to hear well before he needed to hear it.

He stood back up, placed the letter in the top drawer of the desk, and continued to unpack the remainder of this belongings. When he had arranged everything to his liking, he glanced at the clock on his desk: five minutes after five o'clock. He still wanted nothing more than a nap, but, with both of his sister's words in mind, he found himself reaching for the door instead. Padding quietly down the hall, he found Mr. Wallace in the kitchen, his back turned.

Taking a deep breath, he cleared his throat.

Mr. Wallace turned with a smile. "Decided to come help after all?"

Edmund gave a hesitant smile in return. "I figured it couldn't hurt."

"Grab a knife. You can help me chop up these vegetables."

Moving further into the kitchen area, he did just that, setting to work on a second cutting board.

"So," Mr. Wallace started, "you're from the London area, right?"

* * *

Peter sighed as he reached for the door knob of room 315. Time to find out if leaving his room assignment to chance had actually been a good idea or not. He'd had good luck the previous year, and he hoped it would be the same this time. But he hadn't had the chance to meet him yet; he'd barely arrived with enough time to check in and leave his things in the room before sprinting off again for orientation. Now that it was after dinner and he was finally getting back to the room, he hoped he'd finally get to the meet the man.

Pushing open the door, he wasn't surprised to see the far side of the room already occupied, though the occupant himself was still nowhere to be seen. As he moved his hastily abandoned luggage from the floor by the door to the bed, he glanced over the room, trying to learn what he could about his roommate from what he could observe.

There wasn't much to see, but if the framed image of the Virgin Mary sitting beside a string of Rosary beads on the desk was anything to go by, the man was obviously Catholic. He frowned. That could make this year interesting to say the least.

Shaking his head, he set about unpacking. He made short work of the task, and, as he came to the bottom of his last bag, he found an envelope. He took it out and sat on his bed to read the enclosed letter, grinning from ear to ear.

 _To High King Peter the Magnificent, Lord of Cair Paravel, Emperor of the Lone Islands, Sir Wolfsbane of the Most Noble Order of the Lion_

 _Greetings!_

 _I pray all is well with you, my brother, and that your travels have been blessed by Aslan. May your journey be fruitful, and may Aslan guide your every step. Never lose sight of your purpose. Return to us speedily and in victory._

 _Your loving sister,_

 _Queen Lucy the Valiant, Lady of the Most Noble Order of the Crown_

Underneath the text was the sketch of a Lion with what appeared to be the ocean behind it. She had done this last year as well - but with a different drawing; it had been the lamppost in Lantern Waste last year -but he couldn't say that he minded. As pretentious as all of his titles had seemed at one time, he was glad to see them scrawled in his youngest sibling's hand once again.

"What you've got mail already? Lucky bloke."

Peter started, his gaze flying toward the door. Sure enough, he'd been engrossed enough that he'd failed to hear the door open. He chuckled, an easy smile returning. "From my youngest sister," he supplied. "She did this last year, too - snuck it into the bottom of one of my bags when I wasn't looking - as if I'm several days' journey aways instead of little more than an hour." He paused, returning the letter to the envelope. "I'm Peter Pevensie."

"Charles Fenn."

Peter stood, closed the short distance between them, and shook the proffered hand. "I hope we'll get along well this year."

Charles smiled in return. "I'm sure we will."

"So, where are you from?" Peter asked.

"Cardiff. I'm afraid I can't talk now, though," Charles stated as he moved across the room. "I need to get ready to leave for Mass."

"I see. We'll talk later then."

"I take it you either aren't Catholic or stick to tradition, huh?"

Peter shifted uncomfortably. "I guess you could say that."

Charles smiled. "Hey, I've got nothing against it either way, you know. Where do you attend?"

"Well," Peter started, scratching the back of his neck and looking away. "I… I don't really… attend anywhere. Not on a regular basis, at least. I still go with my family when I'm home though." He could see his roommate staring at him with an unreadable expression out of the corner of his eye.

"I see," Charles finally said, his voice as emotionless as his face was unreadable. "To each their own, I guess." He glanced at the clock. "I have to go. I'll see you later."

Peter sighed in relief as the door clicked shut again behind his roommate. _What have I gotten myself into?_ he wondered.

* * *

Edmund heaved a sigh, staring up at the sky from between the leaves of the tree he was sitting under. Susan was going to kill him for this, but he couldn't help it. Students had begun to arrive an hour before, and, though he knew he shouldn't have, he had bolted. When his third dormmate had entered the building, he'd made a bee-line for the back door. Outside, down the steps of the deck, and about fifty feet away to a giant oak tree behind the house.

What was he even doing here? He couldn't do this. He wasn't good at meeting people.

He scoffed at himself for the thought. In Narnia, he'd been a master diplomat, but somehow those skills hadn't made the trip back to England with him. He'd had no problem meeting with foreign dignitaries and traveling to other lands to make treaties. But now he couldn't even seem to say 'hello' to the people living under the same roof. Just like everything else, he had known he'd have to reacquire those skills as he grew up for the second time, but he didn't remember it being so difficult before.

"There you are."

Edmund jerked his head around, heart racing. "Mr. Wallace. You startled me."

"Sorry." He smiled. "We're just waiting on one more student to arrive. You should come back inside."

Edmund swallowed around the sudden lump in his throat. Oh, great. First, he'd run away. Now, everyone was going to watch him walk back in from where he'd been hiding.

"Don't worry," Mr. Wallace added, seeming to know exactly what Edmund was thinking, "most of your dormmates are still unpacking in their rooms."

Sighing in relief, Edmund stood up, dusting off the seat of his britches. "Thank you. It would have been awkward to walk in with everyone watching."

"You seem a little… _hesitant_ when it comes to meeting people," Mr. Wallace commented as they started back for the steps, concern mostly masked by his smile. "So I figured it might be appreciated to find you before your absence could bring unwanted attention."

Edmund followed in silence. For a moment, he wondered when he'd become so easy for strangers to read, but he _had_ fled so, really, there wasn't much mystery to it. Sliding the door closed behind him, he headed for the sitting area. The only other people there so far were the other three teachers living in the adjacent apartments and two students that looked as apprehensive as he felt. He offered a hesitant smile to the two boys but, in the end, opted to sit in one of the overstuffed armchairs across the room.

It didn't take long for the other boys to start trailing in, loud conversations and boisterous laughter following them from the bedrooms out to the main area of the house. As everyone filed in and found somewhere to sit, Edmund noticed Mr. Wallace bring up the rear and realized he must have been going around shooing everyone out. Edmund glanced over the students gathered; nineteen in total, himself included.

"Alright, quiet down. Quiet down, please."

Edmund could honestly say he was impressed. He'd never seen a room fall silent so quickly.

"I know everyone is excited to be back," Mr. Wallace started, "so I won't keep you long. I'm not going to go over every rule, like some of the dorm heads do. You all have a handbook, and you're all expected to read it. Besides that, returning students should already know the rules, so it would only be a waste of time. However, we do have four new students with us this year, and a few things have changed, so I am going to go over a few things briefly.

"First up, curfew has been changed slightly for forms one and two. Returning students especially, please take note of that. Along that same line, room checks with be conducted on Tuesdays and Fridays this year, instead of Mondays and Thursdays. I will be lenient the first week or two, but please try to remember to get your jobs done.

"Second, advisor groups. If you don't know who your advisor is, come talk to me as soon as we dismiss. Meals are still on Tuesday nights. Know when your group is up. Don't forget. Don't be late. All meals and meetings are posted in blue ink on the calendar at the beginning of each month.

"Third and final, dorm activities." A brief burst of whoops and cheers interrupted before he could continue. "An obvious favorite. All activities will be posted on the calendar; red ink means it's mandatory, black ink means it's voluntary. Among those activities, are the traditional Halloween and Christmas decorating contests, where we compete against the other dorms. We try to do things you'll all enjoy, and if you have an idea for something you'd like to do, let me know, and I will see what I can do to arrange it."

He paused for a moment, then, with slightly devilish grin, he stated, "And now, for my favorite part of this meeting: the new students get to introduce themselves."

Edmund froze. No. _He had no been told he would have to do this. No._

"Tell us your name, where you're from, your year in school, something about your family, and something about yourself."

Edmund scarcely registered the responses of the other three, only enough to learn their names that two of them were in form one and the other was in form two. He was only new, upper-form student. He wiped his sweaty palms on his pants, and dredged up his resolve. _You were a diplomat once; if you could stand and stare the Tisroc in the eye, then you can spend twenty seconds introducing yourself._

Mr. Wallace caught his gaze, and he knew it was his turn. He swallowed past the lump in his throat and took a deep breath. "I'm Edmund Pevensie. I'm from Finchley, England, just north of London. I'm in the fourth form. I have an older brother, an older sister, and a younger sister. And, uhm…" He faltered. What was something interesting about himself? He wasn't sure there _was_ anything interesting he could say. "And, uhm… I like to play chess, I guess?" he finished, awkwardly rubbing the nape of his neck.

"See? I'm _not_ the only one!"

Edmund's head whipped around to find the indignant voice. A dark haired boy, possibly a year younger than himself, had his arms crossed and was glaring comedically at the boy next to him who was trying not to laugh.

Mr. Wallace, chuckling a bit himself, clapped his hands once to gain everyone's attention again, and announced, "Alright, that's all I've got for you. Get out of here."

Most of the students rose from their seats and headed back to their rooms to finish unpacking, though a few stayed behind, talking. One student with a muscular build - Edmund guessed him to be at least one form above himself - ambled over and perched himself on the arm of the couch that sat next to the chair he had claimed.

"So. I finally get to meet my roommate then. I'm Thomas Rourck."

Edmund caught himself before he gave his name again, and instead offered his hand to shake. "A pleasure."

"I was kind of surprised when Mr. Wallace came and told me I got the foreign exchange student as my roommate. You came a long way. How far is it from London?"

"Well, I came by boat, so it took about five days. I spent a lot of time on trains and in cars, too. It was definitely a long trip." He sighed. "I just hope it'll be worth it."

"It will be," Thomas stated confidently. "Trust me. Once classes get started, you'll see for yourself. St. John's isn't like any other school."

Neither boy quite knew what to say after that, and an awkward silence came between the two. Edmund was about to excuse himself for any reason he could think of - to the toilet or maybe he could come up with some question to ask Mr. Wallace - when Thomas spoke first.

"So, if you were from near London, were you evacuated when the bombing started, or were you far enough away?"

An interesting topic, but since the war was scarcely a year over, Edmund supposed it wasn't a bad place to try to find common ground of some kind. Or, at the very least, it was better than silence. He nodded once. "We were evacuated. We ended up in Coombe Halt. I don't think we could have ended up more in the middle of nowhere than that."

"I can't even imagine that. Six years ago you would have been, what? Ten?"

"Yeah, just barely. It was hard, but at least we had each other - not like our mum who was alone then."

Thomas hesitated. "Where was your dad?"

"Drafted. Right after the start of the war." He smiled sadly. "We were lucky, though. He came back in the beginning of '42. Not everyone was so fortunate."

"He came home before the war ended?"

It was Edmund's turn to hesitate. His father hadn't talked much about the war, especially not about his last mission. Edmund had asked about it once, but his father only shook his head and told him they'd all been through enough without having to know the details. "He doesn't talk about it much," he finally sighed, "but he was injured when his plane was shot down, and he was honorably discharged after because of his injuries. He still has a bit of a limp from it."

"Wait, your dad was a pilot?" Thomas grinned. "My dad was too."

Recognition dawned on Edmund's face. _So that's why he was asking about the war,_ he thought. _It's definitely common ground._

"Not at first, though," Thomas continued. "He was in Hawaii on business - was supposed to be there for just six months, but ended up being there for almost seven. Because he was delayed in getting back, he was there when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. So when President Roosevelt declared war, he left his company in his partner's hands and enlisted."

"I'm sure that was hard for you, too, then."

"It was, but I was really proud, too, you know?"

Edmund smiled. "Yeah, I do know." He paused, his smile slipping slightly. "Your dad, did he…" _Did he make it home?_ Edmund couldn't quite bring himself to finish his question.

Thomas's smiled faltered. "No. He didn't come home," he answered anyway.

Edmund felt as though he'd been punched in the stomach. "I am so sorry," he murmured, feeling fifteen years of battles in Narnia wash over him anew. Fifteen years of telling families, _I'm sorry, they aren't coming home._ His own father was alive and well, but Edmund still knew the pain.

"It's all right," Thomas responded quietly. "He died fighting for what he knew was right. I'll admit, I hope I turn out even half as good of a man as he was. I'm proud of him, and I hope I can make him just as proud of me."

"I'm sure you will." Edmund paused, before diverting the topic to something far less depressing. "So, what happened to your dad's company, then?"

"His partner technically owns the whole thing now, but he and my dad were really close friends so he's already told me that half the company is mind when I come of age, if I want it. That's what I'm planning to do when I'm done with school. What about you? What are your plans?"

Edmund sat back, a thoughtful look crossing his face. "I'm not sure yet, but I was thinking about Law."

As the conversation carried on, Edmund couldn't help but wonder what he'd been so afraid over. He was going to have to write to Susan soon to tell her. To tell her, _don't worry, sis; I'm going to be just fine._


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Look who's finally back with an update! Let me make one thing clear: _Narnia is home_. So I will NEVER abandon this story, even if it takes me eight months to get another chapter out. If there's ever any question of what's going on to delay updates, I post statuses at the top of my profile every so often, OR you can check my tumblr! It's mostly Narnia content, but I do also post about my writing woes, lol. Anyway, on to chapter-specific notes.

 _Chapter Notes:_ I think part of the reason I struggled to get this out is because Susan's arc in this chapter reads like the start of a bad romance novel, and her story arc is **NOT NOT NOT** about romance. It's about relationships in general. This is just the first of many. But, yes, unfortunately, it reads like a bad romance. (Like, it's good. I'm happy with it. This story is just not supposed to be a romance, which is why I keep saying it's bad, lol.)

 _Anon Reviews_  
lovefrombelarus: Aww, thank you for your sweet words! *hugs* Don't worry; this story will definitely absolutely never be abandoned! I'm glad you're enjoying it (and I'm hoping you'll still be around now, so many months later, haha!).  
HermionePevensey: I'm flattered then that I got one from you! ...I'm even more flattered you think so highly of it. *cries tears of joy* *hugs* And no worries; I haven't abandoned this! ...I just hope you'll be back after all this time. *sweat drop*  
SerenaEdmunds: *cries* Y-you left me t-two reviews...because you c-care so much... *cries some more* I'm sorry I left you hanging! It makes me happy you think so highly of this work. :3 Ah, yes. I wanted to do something differently from everything I've seen, haha, but more than that, there's actually a very specific reason for that. (No spoilers though, haha, so I can't say what that reason is yet! I will say you are right about Peter, though. :))  
chickencomes1st: I'm so sorry I left you hanging! I do feel horrible... especially since, you, too, left me two reviews... *cries* *also hugs* I am not Catholic myself, but I have very specific reasons for why I made Peter's roommate such, haha. Since I am not myself, I just hope I don't get anything wrong. (Please do tell me if I do, though. I don't try to get things wrong, and I would want to fix it if I ever do!) Ah, yes. I have lots of plans for Edmund, ahahaha. (Nothing this chapter though. :P)  
All4Aslan: Thank you, as always, for reviewing! I have a lot in store for Peter and his roommate and they definitely don't get a long very well for a while, ahahahaha. *hugs*

...I hope all my signed-in reviewers don't feel left out, because I just hugged all my nonys. So, hugs for everyone! *hugs*

* * *

 **Chapter Five**

* * *

Friday nights were always slow and a bit lonely, and Susan found herself _always_ working then. She would start at two o'clock and leave promptly at eight, and for those six hours, she would do more in the way of needlework than she would in the way of shelving books. Students were more preoccupied with having fun than working on papers, and she couldn't say as she blamed them. If she had chosen to continue her education, she was sure she would have taken Friday nights to herself as well.

She glanced at the clock and sighed. Five more minutes, then she could lock the doors and go home. At least, she _hoped_ that's all there would be to it.

Robert Thatcher, as it turned out, had not enlisted and just so happened to be a student on the very same campus where she worked. Once he had found out she worked in the library, he would come by often, especially on Friday nights when he knew she'd be working. No matter how many times she rejected him, he couldn't seem to take the hint and came back week after week, still hoping to get a date. However, he hadn't been waiting for her last week, so she hoped perhaps another poor girl had captured his fancy, and he'd leave her alone now.

She packed up her embroidery and, deciding there was little point in staying open for one last minute, stepped out into the chilly autumn air and locked the doors behind her.

"Evening, Miss Pevensie."

Still facing the doors, keys in hand, Susan inwardly groaned. Telling him off had apparently had very little effect, so perhaps she should try a different approach, she thought. Turning around, she walked straight passed him without so much as a glance.

"Oh, come now. Don't be that way."

Susan kept walking as if he wasn't trailing behind her like a little lost puppy, and yet he kept right on talking. "You were quite harsh the last time we talked, you know. It wasn't very lady-like. You should be grateful I even came back."

He was trying to rile her up, and she knew it, but she wasn't going to take the bait this time. Just like her sister, she needed to take a new approach to her situation. If the cold shoulder didn't work, however, she wasn't sure what else would be left to try.

"Really now, you _are_ playing hard to get - ."

"I do believe the lady has made it quite clear she has no interest in you, good sir."

Susan stopped short, Robert almost running into her back as the newcomer stepped out of the shadows of the Student Life building beside them.

"I don't believe this is any of your concern," Robert growled.

"You are clearly bothering the lady, so I've made it my concern."

As the stranger stepped forward, Susan noted he was a head taller than Robert, and Robert was, by no means, short himself. She squinted in the dim light, trying to make out his face. He was obviously a student here so chances were good she'd seen him before, but it was already too dark to tell.

"I just want moment of her time, that's all."

"I watched her tell you off two weeks ago from the window there -" he nodded towards the building he'd just come out of - "so something tells me you've already _had_ a moment of her time."

Was he...grinning? He was definitely grinning, she decided. He appeared to be enjoying this more than she was. Or perhaps he was trying to look more confident and intimidating? She remembered using that very tactic herself while ruling in Narnia. She had made many a dignitary uncomfortable in her presence with only a grin.

In the distance an owl hooted, pulling her from her thoughts back into the quiet night. The two men had lapsed into a silent standoff; she would be here all night if she waited one of them to give in.

"As delightful as this is," she stated, "I have to be getting home. Good evening to you." Without waiting for a word from either man, she turned on her heel and continued towards the station at a brisk pace. A moment passed, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Robert wasn't giving chase - at least, not tonight.

Quick footsteps on the pavement behind her made her groan out loud. Even when confronted by someone else, Robert just couldn't take a hint, could he? She whirled around, setting her expression into the no-nonsense mask of her former queenly self. "Now look here, I have a half a mind - ." She stopped short. That wasn't Robert.

"My apologies," he chuckled. "I was only hoping you'd allow me to walk you to your destination. It's getting dark, and I wouldn't feel right letting you walk alone."

"Yes, well, I can take care of myself."

"I have no doubt about that, actually."

"Then, thank you for getting Robert off my back, but I'll be just fine to get home." She turned and started off again. "Good evening to you, sir."

"You're not even going to ask my name?" he called after her.

Without missing a beat, she called back, "Why would I? I appreciate the help, but I didn't ask for it." She could hear him laughing behind her, but he wasn't following her.

"Good evening, then, Miss Pevensie."

Susan took a few more steps before realizing _he knew her name._ Stopping, she turned her head to look for him again, but he had already disappeared. She shook her head as she picked up her pace, realizing she was never going to make it home at this rate.

 _A coincidence,_ she thought. _It's just a coincidence that he knows my name._ She frowned. Honestly, he'd probably overheard it in the library one day. But why bother to remember it? She sighed audibly into the quiet night. Why couldn't these silly boys just leave her alone already?

* * *

Lucy bit her tongue as she listened to Patricia Jenkins rattle on about how women should stick to feminine pursuits if they bothered working outside the home at all.

"After all, that's the way it's always been, since Adam and Eve. Why should we think to change it now? It's always been the woman's place to run the home and the man's to work and go off to war. Those women who were pilots are just plain batty if you ask me."

It took everything in her being to not tear into her classmate about how utterly _wrong_ she was. Taking a deep breath, Lucy chose to smile instead and, keeping her voice pleasant, posed a question. "So what do you think about Deborah then?"

Patricia frowned, looking down her nose to where Lucy sat in the grass behind her. "What are you talking about, Pevensie?"

"Deborah. You know, Deborah and Barak? From the Bible. She was a judge who led into battle because Barak was too much of a coward. Not to mention later on in that battle General Sisera was killed by a woman. That's not really 'woman's work,' wouldn't you say?"

"Yes, well, they were doing the Lord's work, so I guess that would be an exception," Patricia snorted. "Besides, if she hadn't been _at home_ at the time, that woman wouldn't have been there to kill the general. But now days, women shouldn't be involved in those things."

"Why not?"

"It's...just not very ladylike, that's all."

"What defines 'ladylike'?"

"Being proper."

"Define 'being proper'."

Patricia stood up from the bench with a huff. "You are insufferable, Pevensie. You know _exactly_ what I mean by it."

"But supposing I don't. Why don't you enlighten me?" Lucy sighed inwardly. It was exhausting dealing with her this way, and she wasn't even sure it was making a difference anyway.

"If you need me to explain it, then your upbringing was even worse than I'd supposed it to be." With a flounce of her curls, she turned and stalked away, her posse close on her heels.

"You two have never really gotten along, have you?"

Lucy turned her attention back to her friend. "Never. She calls _me_ insufferable, but she's the one who is so closed-minded to new ideas."

"Not that I disagree with you, Lucy, but why do you even care what she thinks about it?"

"You do realize that stuck-up prig is going to have children of her own someday, don't you, Marjorie? And she'll pass on what she believes." Lucy paused. "What _do_ you think about the Women's Movement? I want an honest answer."

Marjorie thought for a moment. "I hadn't thought much on it, honestly. I think it's great, what with petitioning for equal wages and all, but what's so wrong about women not participating in government? It's kind of boring, don't you think?"

"It's wrong because women don't need men to think for them. We have brains too, after all. In fact, we think of things that may not occur to a man at all." How many laws, she wondered, had she drafted in Narnia that her brothers hadn't even considered? She'd lost count before the end of the fifth year of their reign. She stood as the bell rang for class to resume, brushing dead leaves and dirt from her skirt. "Women are not incapable leaders."

"Well," Marjorie commented, following Lucy into the building, "I know one woman I'd definitely support in a political office."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. You."

Lucy smiled. "Well, I'm glad I have at least one person on my side."

Marjorie shrugged. "I may not want to be involved myself since I don't really know anything about it, but you know a lot and _do_ want to be involved. I don't think you should be kept out just because you're a girl."

"You're not just saying that because we're friends, are you?"

"Of course not! Don't be daft," Marjorie exclaimed as they sat down in their seats. "I think I've always believed people should be able to do what they want. I don't know; you just seem like the kind of person that could actually make that happen. Someday, anyway."

"Thank you for that. Sometimes I wonder if I truly can."

"I think if it's you, you'll find a way."

* * *

Susan tucked an errant strand of hair behind her ear as she slid the last book in her load back onto the shelf. As she turned to go back to the front desk, she couldn't stop the sigh that escaped her lips. She didn't mind her job, but it certainly wasn't what she had thought she would end up doing. When she was young, she had wanted nothing more than to be a housewife, like her own mother was. But then they had gone to Narnia, and she had been so much more. She didn't know what she wanted now, but she was sure that shelving books for the rest of her life wasn't it.

This was only temporary, she had to remind herself. She could pursue other things later, but for now this was what she had to do. That acknowledgement didn't make it easier to bear, however. After everything in Narnia, such monotonous work was almost maddening sometimes.

Susan sat down behind the desk and almost immediately a tall man approached, three books tucked under his arm.

"I need to check these out, please."

"Of course." Her eyebrows rose as she glanced at the titles. "Rather heavy reading for a Tuesday, isn't it?"

He chuckled. "I suppose so, but I don't plan to read them through. I've got a paper due soon; they're just for a bit of research."

She glanced at his student ID card before filling out the check-out cards and handing the books back. "Well, enjoy your researching then."

"Oh, I will. Biology is fascinating to me. I hope to teach it myself one day." Taking the books off the counter, he turned to leave before pausing. "By the way, has Mr Thatcher bothered you again since Friday, or is that just a Friday thing?"

Susan started, her gaze flying from the desk to where he still stood. "Pardon?"

"Robert Thatcher. He is quite taken with you and doesn't seem to be able to take 'no' for an answer." He half turned back to her. "He _is_ quite persistent, I'll give him that, at least."

She realized then that the man who had chased Robert off was standing right in front of her. He had been here frequently since she had started working, but how long had he been observing her to know so much? "Terrific. Now I have _two_ stalkers instead of one."

A baffled look crossed his face. "What? No. I'm not stalking you."

Susan crossed her arms over her chest, leaning back in the chair. "Really. I know nothing about you and yet you know rather a lot about me - more than you should, anyway, considering this is the most words we've ever had occasion to exchange."

"Well," he murmured, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, "'stalker' is such a strong term…"

"What would you call it then?"

"Admiring from afar?"

Susan rolled her eyes. "Look, I appreciate what you did, but please just leave me alone. I'm really not interested in someone who can't walk up to me and start a conversation without 'admiring from afar' for months beforehand."

"Well," he shifted uncomfortably, glancing away, "you are a bit...intimidating - though I don't mean that in a bad way."

"Intimidating?" No one had used that word to describe her since her first suitor in Narnia. She had thought Lord Rhaelvez wasn't actually interested in her, but when the truth had come out, they'd had a good laugh about it. The courtship hadn't worked out, but they had remained good friends until the end. She had heard from others in the castle that visiting dignitaries often used that term to describe her, but only the lord from Terebinthia had ever dared to say it to her face. But, here and now, in a different world, someone had done it again.

"I'm not sure that's really the right word, but…" He paused. "If I'm being perfectly honest, you caught my attention because you're not like other women I've met, and I could tell that the moment I saw you."

"Flattery," Susan interrupted, eyes narrowing, "will get you absolutely nowhere with me."

"Yes," he smiled, "I had surmised as much. I suppose that's part of the reason you're intimidating." He turned for the door again. "I do apologize, Miss Pevensie. I did not intend to be disrespectful, but I am afraid I have come off as such."

And then he was gone, leaving Susan to frown at the door as it swung closed behind him.

* * *

Lucy sighed as she folded the letter and slipped it into the waiting envelope. She was writing to her parents, to Susan, and to Edmund and mailing them together to save on postage. Overseas post was expensive. Edmund had only been able to write once because of it and had crammed letters to all of them into one parcel, resulting in much shorter letters to each of them than Lucy knew he normally would have written. It was the same to send him mail, as well. Their whole family would write a short letter and all of them would be bundled and sent together. As a result, she didn't hear from him nor get to write to him as much as she would have liked.

Setting it to the side on top of the envelope neatly addressed to Peter, she pulled another sheet of paper in front of her and started her last letter.

 _My dearest Susan_

 _Do you remember Prince Rabadash? (Of course you do; who could forget?) Well, this certainly reminds me of then. I guess people like that exist in every world. Too bad Aslan can't simply turn Mr Thatcher into a donkey, too. But look on the brightside: at least he can't threaten war on us - although I do dare say that is the_ only _brightside in all of this. I do pity him though. After all, he's going to spend the rest of his days chasing after someone that is, for him, completely unattainable. I do pray that one day soon he will decide to leave you alone._

 _It does sound as though neither of us is having much luck, doesn't it? The girls here are as ignorant and snobbish as always, but I am grateful to have Marjorie on my side still. I do believe she is the only one._

Lucy paused, rereading what she had written, before continuing on with everything she'd been up to as of late, including one particularly amusing story involving the Headmistress, a bird, and a giant puddle. Upon hearing the bell signaling dinner, she quickly finished so she could drop her letters in the post on her way.

 _I do so miss you, Susan. School isn't quite the same without you here. I cannot wait for the Christmas holiday when all of us will be together again, even if only for a brief time._

 _Sending my love and praying for you always  
_ _Your loving sister,  
_ _Lucy_

She folded the paper, sealed the second envelope, and, grabbing her coat, headed out of her room.

A cool breeze met her as she pushed open the door of the dormitory. It was nearly November now; less than two months remained until she would be reunited with her siblings again. That thought alone caused a warmth to spread in her chest and at the same time filled her with a deep longing.

' _Soon,'_ she kept telling herself. _'Soon we'll be together again and can talk openly about Narnia and can help ease the ache in each other's hearts.'_

Sighing, she slowed to a halt on the strangely empty sidewalk. "Aslan," she whispered, casting her gaze to the gray skies above. "I know You said You're always with us - even here in England - but it's so hard. It's so hard to even _look_ for You here when my heart longs to be with You again, in Your presence. Be with my sister; I know she sometimes doubts You. Please give her the faith she needs to keep pushing on. Be with Edmund; I've only had one letter from him, and it seems he's doing well, but I know he struggles, too. He's never liked being away from us for long, but this situation has placed him on his own. Bring him home safely to us. Be with Peter. Bring someone alongside him to encourage him in his studies. Be with us all. Help us not to lose sight of what is most important. To Aslan I give these things."

With another sigh, she started back on her way, her heart lighter than it had been a moment before. A smile crept onto her lips. Aslan would hear her and answer. He would take care of them.

He always did, after all.

* * *

Susan had come to dread closing up the library on Friday nights but had no good reason to ask for that time off either. Any of her coworkers she had told about her predicament had responded in like-kind: "Robert Thatcher? You should be flattered he's paying you attention. I don't see the problem."

And with those words came an even better understanding of her sister. _Harassment_ shouldn't be seen as _flattery._ Susan knew that respect regardless of gender was, in part, what the Women's Movement stood so forcefully for, and now, if only for that reason, she almost wanted to join herself.

Squaring her shoulders, she stepped outside and locked the doors behind her. This ended tonight, even if she had to punch him in the nose herself.

As she turned to leave, a figure moved from the shadows where he was leaning against one of the pillars.

"Good evening, Miss Pevensie."

Susan stared, her lips pursed. "You again."

"Well, I thought you'd probably be happier to see me than Mr Thatcher, at any rate."

"Yes, but I do believe I told _you_ to let me be as well."

"You did, and I am, I promise. I only addressed you so I wouldn't startle you, but really I'm just here as a deterrent. He did come by, you know, but when he saw me here, he left. I guess he didn't want a fight tonight." He paused. "I really am sorry, you know. I didn't mean any disrespect, and I still don't now. I realize I've lost your respect already, but I don't like seeing boys harass women, so if you'll bear with me, I'll keep him from waiting for you when you close up. I know you can handle yourself, but you shouldn't have to."

Susan studied him carefully. He seemed sincere, and he was certainly the first person outside her family to acknowledge Robert's actions as harassment. He may have gone about getting her attention in the wrong way, but he didn't seem like most men she'd met. On top of that, he seemed vaguely familiar in that way someone you used to know does when you see them again after years apart but don't recognize them at first. Still, that didn't mean she had to like him. "You cannot lose something you never had and you never had my respect, but I suppose I should at least say 'thank you' then." She stepped to the side. "So, thank you."

As she started off, she caught a glimpse of the smile that lit up his face. She didn't have to like him, but she supposed she could still be grateful. She had taken only a few steps away before calling out to him, almost before the thought had fully formed in her mind.

"Walk me to the station."

"Pardon?"

She could hear the puzzlement in his voice, and turned back towards him as she repeated her statement. "I said, walk me to the station. You offered the other night, and now I'm taking you up on it."

He quickly closed the distance and, as they headed down the path, he asked, "What made you change your mind?"

Susan didn't so much as spare him a glance as she answered. "My father brought me up to appreciate those who show kindness. He also taught me to be kind to others; you never know when you'll need a favor, after all."

Her companion chuckled. "He sounds like a smart man."

"The smartest I know," she replied with a smile of her own.

They continued the rest of the way to the station in comfortable silence. As they walked, Susan couldn't help feeling as though this new acquaintance was actually a very old friend. It was strange, but perhaps not _bad_. When they arrived, he tipped his hat, bid her a good night, and turned back towards the campus.

"You know," Susan called to him, causing him to pause and turn to face her again, "I never did get your name. I see so many people in the library that I'm afraid I can't recall it."

With a smile, he replied, "Jacob Lewis. My friends just call me Jack, though."

Susan couldn't help but return his smile. "Well. Thank you again, Mr Lewis." Without another word, she turned and descended the steps.

' _Jacob Lewis,'_ she thought. _'Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad to have someone like him around, after all.'_


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N:** I'm back! ...about a month late and nickel short, lol. Really, this should have been (and I wanted it to be) posted on more like _December_ 3rd as opposed to January 3rd, but, hey... Also, I try to reply to everyone that leaves a signed-in review but the last two months have been crazy so if I missed you, I'm really, really sorry and I still love you and appreciate you, lol.

This chapter's a bit on the short side, but next chapter is probably going to be twice this length because of reasons, so it kind of evens out in the end. :P

 _Chapter notes:_ None that I can think of, but I'm sick so I'll probably remember something after it's too late. *shrugs* ...also, yes, Peter is an idiot in this chapter a little bit, but honestly I think it makes perfect sense, so... :P

 _Religious Notes:_ Ah, yes. I said there would be religious themes herein, and I meant it. No Spoilers, but get ready for the major start to that with this chapter.

 _Anon Reviews:_  
chickencomes1st: Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed all of it! :D You're wish is my command: we're back to the boys this time around! *sings loudly* The boys are back in town! Yeah, the boys are back in town! *ahem* Anyway, I sort of managed to not be gone as long? Two months IS better than eight, after all. *cough*  
ILoveNarnia: It always made me sad, too, reading about how everything changed over time. :( Glad you're enjoy the story though! Thanks for reading! :)  
Serena Edmunds: I'll admit: I laughed your description, there, and you are definitely not wrong, lol. I won't say that I never read stories with an OC main character, but they have to be pretty well-written for me to get very far, lol. I can't really say this update was soon, but it was...soon-ish? Sooner than last time, lol.  
All4Aslan: Definitely a reference, lol. You're wish is my command: the boy are back this chapter! :D

* * *

 **Chapter Six**

"There you are!"

Edmund glanced up to where his roommate was standing in the doorway, smiling widely.

"We're going to start decorating in a few minutes. Are you coming?"

Turning his gaze back to the photographs on his desk, he sighed. "I don't know." He heard the door click closed and out of the corner of his eye saw Thomas lean against the wall next to his desk.

"Is everything alright?" Thomas murmured. "You were excited earlier this week."

Edmund grimaced. If he were being honest, the ache in his chest had settled in around the end of October and had steadily grown as the days passed. Now, as December descended, his chest felt hollow. "I guess I'm just missing home. I've never been away from everyone for so long, and it's been harder than I thought it would be."

"You went to a boarding school before though?"

"I did, but most of that I had my brother with me at least. Even last year I still saw everyone every holiday, and my sisters weren't far so we would often arrange to meet on weekends. And we wrote to each other most every week besides." He shook his head. "I've only been able to get letters from them all twice."

"You all are really close, I know. I'm not all that close to my brother, so I can't really imagine."

Edmund shrugged. "It's more than that, you know? I just keep thinking back to the war, back to when my dad was off fighting. There was actually a period of time we thought we would never see him again, and all I could think about was the last thing I said to him before he left. Those months were awful for all of us. And now… and now, I just…" He trailed off hesitantly. Maybe it sounded childish, but all he wanted at the moment was to see his family, all alive and well.

"War changes people," Thomas replied quietly after a moment. "You were forced into the middle of it. I think it's only natural to be anxious to get back home."

A watery smile slipped onto his lips. Thomas had no idea just how true that statement was.

His roommate pushed off the wall. "There's still a couple of weeks left of the term, though, so you'll have to keep pushing through until then. And a good way to do that? Preoccupy your mind with other things."

Edmund glanced up. "Is that your way of trying to persuade me to help decorate?"

"Well, it'll keep you busy for a couple of hours at any rate. Having something to do other than worry will help time go faster. If you ask Mr Wallace, that _is_ part of the reason we have all these activities all term. It's harder to get homesick when you're not thinking about home."

"I'd try to argue, but I know for a fact that if Su was here and knew I was moping, she would be physically trying to remove me from the room, all the while telling me exactly the same thing." He knew because she had done just that their first Christmas as sovereigns. That winter had been rough for all of them, but they had managed. "So I guess maybe you're right."

Thomas smirked. "Oh, I _know_ I am." Turning, he pulled the door open again and gestured towards the hallway. "After you."

With a resigned sigh, Edmund stood up and padded down the hallway to the living room. The furniture had been rearranged already, and the tree stood centered in front of the picture window, waiting to be decorated. Boxes lay stacked about the room, filled with decorations for inside the dormitory as well as for outside. An excited hum came from the students assembled. Perhaps this was just what he needed after all.

His already hesitant smile slipped as he thought about all the years he had spent decorating with his family. This year he would arrive home only a couple of days before the holiday, and all the decorations would already be out. The ache in his chest grew; he longed for everything to be the way it had always been.

This Christmas wouldn't be the same as all the rest, but he _was_ exactly where he needed to be at this moment. He knew this, and he would keep reminding himself of that truth. In two weeks' time, he would be on a boat headed home. With Aslan's help, he could manage until then.

Thomas nudged him and nodded towards one of the boxes. The other students had already begun to hang ornaments on the tree, and the two boys moved forward to join them.

Taking a deep breath, Edmund chose one from the box and placed it on the tree. Things were always changing, but that didn't have to be a bad thing; just because he wasn't home did not mean he couldn't still enjoy himself where he was. He could still celebrate the season with the people around him now, and before too long he would be back with his family again - back where he belonged - and that mattered far more than the decorations.

It wasn't the same, but maybe that was alright.

* * *

"I really think you should come with me, Peter. It's not a normal Mass, after all, just caroling and a reading of the Christmas story. You might find you enjoy it more than you think. Besides, you could use a break from studying."

Peter sighed as he looked up from the notes strewn across the surface of his desk. "If I agree, will you stop pestering me?" He hated to admit it, but he probably _could_ do with a break.

Charles smiled widely. "Well, for _this_ year, at least."

A chuckle slipped out as he shook his head. This was the last Friday before the end of the term; this time next week he would be home with his family, and he wouldn't see his roommate until the New Year. "Alright, fine. I relent."

"Victory!"

"Just be quiet so I can study until time to leave."

"Yes, sir." Charles mock-saluted and turned back to his own notes.

The hour passed all-too quickly, and much sooner than Peter would have liked, he found himself trudging through the chilly evening. The warmth that assaulted him as soon as he stepped inside the cathedral was much welcomed, but the relief quickly turned into hesitation.

It was the same at home; it was the same any time he set foot into a place of worship. He could never seem to fully explain the feeling, but he knew his siblings felt it, too. It was as if they belonged yet didn't. Drawn in yet pushed out at the same time, he never felt quite right in any of these kinds of places.

That was why he only ever went when he had to, yet this night he had found himself there anyway. He was glad he was with Charles; he wasn't sure he would have stayed otherwise, and for some reason he felt, now that he was here, that he _needed_ to stay.

Peter followed his friend into the sanctuary and sat down on one of the long, wooden pews half way down the aisle. Glancing around, he spotted a few other students from some of his classes and briefly wondered if they were here only because it was Christmastime or if they had been coming all term. It didn't matter, he supposed; what they did with their time wasn't his business.

His gaze traveled to the intricate stained glass windows set along both walls. Having grown up in a church, he could identify the stories pictured well enough: Adam and Eve in the the Garden of Eden, the Exodus from Egypt, the birth of the Christ-child and His death… They were beautiful, but they held little significance to him. Perhaps the stories were true; perhaps they were fables. But either way, they paled in comparison to everything he had experienced in Narnia. He would find Aslan here or find No One at all.

The service began, and he stood to sing with everyone else, the words ringing out hollow around him. He sat back down and listened to the ancient words read by the priest and wondered not for the first time if there was any truth in them. A virgin bearing a child, and a god becoming a man? He supposed it wasn't so much more far-fetched than finding an entire world inside a wardrobe. And yet that entire world certainly been more real than anything he had ever experienced inside of a church building.

A few more carols were sung, and then Peter found himself back outside, walking towards the campus.

"So? Was that worth one, short hour of your time?"

"It was more than an hour if you include the twenty minutes walking, you know."

"Fine." Charles rolled his eyes good-naturedly. "Was it worth the _one hour and twenty minutes_ of your time?"

Peter sighed. "Well, it was nice to have a break, at least."

"And now you can go back and be a hermit until final examinations are over, and I won't bother you."

Peter glanced back at the cathedral as they turned a corner; the warm light glowing behind the windows should have been welcoming, but somehow it wasn't. It felt more like the call of a Syren: inviting, sure, but once he got too close, that would be the death of him. He wanted to get close, but some part of his mind warned him against it. At least with a Syren the warning was evident, but this? He couldn't put his finger on it exactly. It didn't make sense at all.

The cathedral disappeared from view, and the pair continued in silence. But there was a question gnawing at the back of Peter's mind, and he knew his roommate wouldn't hesitate to answer it.

"Charles."

"Yes?"

"If God wanted to rescue His people, why send a child? And why go through all the trouble that He did anyway? Wouldn't it have been easier to just... _appear_ and declare Himself God and King? There would have been no question then. Everyone would have believed - well, at least, _more_ people would have."

Charles was quiet for a moment. "It would have been easier, yes; but would it really have been better?"

"What do you mean?"

"He came down for the sole purpose of being the Sacrifice that would end the need for sacrifices. Do you think taking the easier way would have fulfilled that?"

"But if He had set himself up as God on earth, sacrifices still wouldn't have been needed any longer since their purpose was to reconcile the Jews with God. He still could have saved everyone just by coming."

"Are you sure about that?"

Peter fell silent, any further answer dying on his tongue.

"God is love, but He is also justice. Someone or something always had to pay the price for the wrongs committed. And that price had to be paid with blood." Charles paused. "The sacrifices offered daily were imperfect. Only Jesus could put an end to it, but to do so He had to give Himself. More people may have believed the other way, but the sacrifices would have had to continue, and Jesus coming to Earth would not have served its true purpose. Easier isn't always better."

 _A price paid with blood._

Peter shivered in the chilly evening air. His brother had been bought at a such a price in another time, in another world. He still held vivid memories of that moment; her words still echoed in his mind: _"His blood is my property."_ And, oh, he had known he was no match for her, but he wouldn't have allowed her to take his brother back - no, he would have died before he would have let that happen. But he hadn't needed to. Aslan had paid that price instead.

He shook his head. That time wasn't the same as in this world, though. Similar, maybe, but certainly not the same. Maybe, he thought, that was why churches were both inviting and repulsive. There were many things that were familiar but just as many that were different.

"Perhaps." The single word fell heavily from his lips. _A price paid with blood_ was a heavy cost indeed, and a heavy burden for the one for which it was shed. Edmund had never forgotten, he knew; none of them ever would. "But it certainly wasn't what they expected, was it? They wanted a King on a throne and instead got a commoner on a cross."

"That's true, but often times what we _think_ we need isn't what we get, and what we get is _always_ what we _need_."

* * *

Edmund watched as the snowflakes danced outside the window. Snow was a rarity in London, and he hadn't seen this much in one place in six years.

"I guess this _is_ kind of a first for you, isn't it?"

He turned his head from the window to focus on the pot he was stirring. It was the last Tuesday of the term and his advisor group's turn to take over the dorm kitchen. Soup had been an appropriate choice for a day like this one.

"Not a first," he replied, "but it _has_ been a long time since I've seen so much." _Not since Narnia,_ he wanted to add. _Every Christmas had looked like this then._

Joshua smiled. "Personally, I can't wait to get back home. We don't get snow in Florida, and honestly, that is fine by me."

Shrugging, Edmund placed the lid back on the pot. "I can't say that I love it myself, either, but there is a certain beauty to seeing everything covered in white."

"If you say so."

"Well, it certainly beats the dismal gray that is London this time of year."

"I guess when you put it that way… You should come down to Florida sometime. Everything's green all year."

Edmund grinned. Joshua was two years older than him, but Edmund wished he wasn't. Besides his roommate, Joshua was one of his closer friends, and he was certainly going to miss him. "Green sounds fantastic."

The front door slammed and a moment later Mr Wallace appeared from around the corner, an uncharacteristically serious frown on his face. "Edmund, a moment, please?"

His grin instantly fell and his heart beat painfully in his chest as he followed his advisor into the hall, just out of earshot of the other three in the kitchen. "Is everything alright?"

"I'm afraid not." Mr Wallace sighed. "I received a telegram through the main office for you - that's why I had to rush out. I'm afraid I have bad news."

Edmund couldn't breath, his heart freezing in his chest.

" _I'm sorry to bring you such news this time of year, Mrs Pevensie, but your husband has been reported missing."_

"I'm afraid weather conditions over the Atlantic are...unfavorable, and as a result, there aren't many ships daring to cross. Many are saying they won't even try until the New Year."

" _I won't lie, ma'am. He may not be coming home."_

"I'm sorry, Edmund. But you can't go home."


End file.
